Fatty’s Fad Foods

This week, a very unfortunate conversation occurred at work.  Fad diets became the hot topic.  Sugar cleanses.  Juicing.  Atkins.  Paleo.  Keto.  Carb free.  Raw food diet.  Cranberry juice cleanse.  Cabbage soup diet.  Many of these diets are temporary-no one can live on cabbage soup for a lifetime.  And juicing is fun until there’s cake.  Then, cake wins.  ALWAYS.  Cake wins, always. 

I’ve done my fair share of diets.  And I’ve tried the odd thing to lose weight.  Drink unsweetened cranberry juice with every meal.  Know what that does?  Makes you hate life.  I did Paleo- and it helped.  However, you can’t really eat like a caveman.  Know why?  Because there’s no more mammoth, and everything we eat is completely different than anything that existed ten thousand years ago.  But several of the rules are good ones.  Eat foods in their natural forms.  Cut back on highly processed items- and anything that isn’t natural. 

And really, THAT is the rule that fad diets have taught me.  Atkins and Keto focus on keeping carbs low.  If you tend to binge on carbs (cookies, cakes, fries, etc), setting yourself a limit is great.  But restricting yourself to 30 carbs a day (helpful note: that’s 2 pieces of bread) for life is no one’s dream.  But saying “at each meal, I will have 10/20/30 carbs” allows you to have a goal. 

With Paleo, I focused on eating things that occur naturally.  Paleo tells you to not eat beans, dairy, and most starchy veggies.  This, once again, is not something I can maintain.  I love milk, ice cream, cheese, and potatoes.  Giving all that up for life is an impossibility.  But eating natural food, cutting back on artificial ingredients, and eating more whole foods gets you most of the nutrients you need naturally.

Most cleanses are also not maintainable.  Drink only juice for the rest of your life?  Not going to happen.  Most people can’t do that.  And those that do a cleanse to “clean out toxins in their body”- well, you body does that naturally.  Every day.  If it didn’t, you would die.  So following a strict, kale juice only diet might help you lose weight- but it may also make you want to kill people.  And if you scale back too much, as soon as you give up (and you will) you’ll pack back on the weight.  Which makes the suffering so much worse when it was pointless.  And there are smoothies and juices that are great.  There are days when I drink my breakfast because I don’t feel like eating a meal- and it’s easy option.  But a juicing diet would never work for me.  Unless it was ice cream.  Milk shake diet?  I’m in.  But otherwise, no.  No thank you at all. 

Each fad diet has its benefits.  And important lessons can be gleaned from all of them.  But most fad diets are fads for a reason.  No one maintains them for life because it isn’t possible.  But I have found that knowing myself, and knowing what I am capable of, helps me find diet tweaks that work.  And those things are different for everyone.  Research, try different things, and find what works for you.  There isn’t a one size fits all when it comes to anything in life.  And leave room to eat foods you love.  Because sometimes things DO taste better than thin feels (and I should know, I’m fat).               

Fatty’s Fitness Trainer

Up until the start of this year, I had given up on the gym.  Not on exercise (I meander along pretty often just fine at home), but I knew I was going to need a bit of a push to help me lose more weight.  So back to the gym I went.  And once there, I started meeting with a trainer.  I need to have someone push me, check my form, and make sure I’m not slacking.  You know, slacking.  Like walking on the treadmill while eating a doughnut.  Or walking on the elliptical while eating ice cream. . .  BOTH of which I have done.  So, having someone watch me exercise, while awkward, seems to work for me. 

Each week I go to the gym, and off to the trainer I go.  Now, at most gyms, you go in, they have you meet with the trainers, they give you a free session, then they tell you they will charge you some fee per session.  And if you say you don’t know if you can spend an extra $50 a week to meet with them, they say “that’s less than one fancy purse a month!  This is an investment in your health!” as they look at my purse, or clothes, or watch (or pudge), and judge me.  But at Planet Fitness, meeting with a trainer is free.  And each class with the trainer is small- a max of 5 people.  And most times, it’s only me- attempting to reduce the jiggle a little each time I go back.  Oh, jumping jacks- yes, that sounds fun.  Let me just grab some shapeware to secure the belly fat in place, and a sports bra to wrangle the girls, and I’ll get right on it.  Run backwards with weights?  Sure, what could go wrong?  Not like I’ll fall down and hit myself in the face and chest with those.  The trainer comes up with many new and creative ways to torture me, all under the “guise of exercise”.  And it works.  I’m building muscle and losing weight, pushing myself harder than I thought I could.  As an added bonus, I came home this week after my meeting with the trainer and ripped the handle right off the freezer (pictures below).         

I have also found that going to a trainer has put my competitive nature into full drive.  If there’s another person with me doing the same thing, I push myself harder to match (or, mostly, beat) them.  I always feel accomplished when I can outperform the skinny buff girl or tiny gymnast ninja that is attending a session with me.  And, of course, an added bonus if I outperform my husband. 

It can be a bit stressful to have someone watch you exercise.  But the payoff is often worth it.  And having someone who knows what to do show you how to do it is even better.  Of course, I’m also being told to clean up my diet and “try harder” to “create a better version of myself”.  But I figure meeting with the trainer one to three times a week also gives me the chance to meander along at home on the elliptical while eating ice cream.  And that, my friends, is priceless.                     

Date Truffle Balls (healthy chocolate salty nut balls)

Dates: a food ancient people loved and considered a sweet treat.  High in iron, B-6, fiber, and Magnesium- they’re also good for you.  So a good for you fruit seems to be a great snack option, right?  Well, that’s all good and fine if dates were delicious.  But on their own they are not.  They’re sweet, but not very tasty.  The ancient people are horrible, horrible liars.  Dates by themselves do not taste great, and look a bit like a cocoon or bug- which creeps me out.

So how do you make something healthy (but ugly) tasty?  Without coating it in butter, ranch, or sugar- things that make healthy not so healthy?  You make the dates a transport device for chocolate.  Pretty much everything covered in chocolate is better.  I once had cocoa dusted Brussel sprouts and it made them non-disgusting.  So really, adding chocolate makes food better.  And cocoa itself is good for you- it contains iron and protein, as well as fiber, which are all good additions to fruit.  Then by adding almonds and pecans you’re getting magnesium, potassium, calcium, and more fiber.  These things are fiber monsters.  You’ll never have to worry about pooping again!  So each ingredient that goes into this recipe is good for you, and the flavors meld together to make a really tasty snack.  Plus, the natural sweetness of the dates makes the truffle taste indulgent- without adding sugar or anything bad for you!

Date Truffle Balls

1/3 cup pecans
1/3 cup almonds or almond flour (I used almond flour)
1 1/3 cups dates (pitted)
2 tbsp unsweetened cocoa powder
1/2 tsp vanilla extract
2 tbsp milk or water

Pecans, almonds, cocoa, and coconut flakes for coating

1. Place pecans, almonds (almond flour), pitted dates, cocoa powder, and vanilla in food processor. Blend until smooth.  With whole pecans and almonds, this can take some time.
2. After all the items are blended, check the consistency. If the paste is too firm (too difficult to roll into a ball) add milk or water.
3. Roll date mixture into balls, then roll in pecan, almond, cocoa, or coconut to coat.
4. Refrigerate or freeze after making.

This recipe is a simple, delicious way to make a healthy snack.  I always refrigerate the date balls after making them to firm them up- they can get pretty soft and messy.  One mistake I made the last time I made these was letting the mixture sit for too long.  It made it too moist- the juices starting releasing from the dates and it made rolling the balls more difficult.  I refrigerated the mixture in between batches and that seemed to firm them up enough to roll them.  Another option is to add more almonds or pecans- this will make the mixture easier to work with and less runny.

Overall, I think this snack is a great one.  I grab a few before I run and they give me a bit of a pick-me-up.  And each ball, depending on the size, has about 60 calories.  The coating also impacts the calories- I used almonds, pecans, and sweetened coconut, and this causes fluctuations in the nutrition for each ball.

No matter how good for you something is, you’re not going to eat it if you hate it.  I’m not a huge fan of dates.  But when you add other flavors, it creates a whole new taste.  And all the other ingredients add more good-for-you vitamins!  So you have a super food that tastes super incredible!  And if you have kids, it’s a great way to con them into eating healthy.  And who doesn’t love tricking kids into doing things that are good for them?!  (Note to people who don’t have kids: DO NOT offer healthy candy to stranger’s children- you’re going to jail).  On my quest to lose weight and eat better, finding things I enjoy eating is the best way to go.  And these healthy chocolate salty nut balls are a dream!

Fatty’s Fast Feast

Breakfast- the foundation of a good day.  But when you are employed full time (or are incredibly lazy, both of which I happen to be), it can be difficult to find time to make something each morning.  I have found that including protein into my breakfast makes me feel full for longer, and also keeps my blood sugar from shooting up and then crashing.  But making eggs every morning is time consuming, and not really logical for a person like me that wants to wake up as late as possible and then watch Judge Judy.  So, I need a way to make something healthy that doesn’t take forever and require effort of any kind.  I have found that making large portions over the weekend, and then splitting it up during the week, works best for me.  That’s where the following recipe comes in handy:

SLOW COOKER EGG CASSEROLE

• 6 large eggs
• 1/4 cup milk
• 1/2 cup Greek yogurt
• onion powder
• garlic powder
• 1 can diced mushrooms (4 oz, a small can)
• 1 cup (packed) baby spinach
• 1 cup shredded cheese (I used mild cheddar)
• 1 cup turkey ham, diced

1. In a bowl, whisk the eggs, milk, yogurt, onion powder, and garlic powder together until smooth.
2. Stir in the mushrooms, spinach, cheese, and turkey ham.
3. Spray slow cookerwith non-stick cooking spray.
4. Pour eggs mixture into the bottom of slow cooker.
5. Cover and cook on HIGH for 90 minutes to 2 hours. Eggs should be set.

(recipe taken from https://www.365daysofcrockpot.com/recipe-for-slow-cooker-egg-spinach-and/)

Now, I did some things differently than what was in the recipe, so I updated it from the site I took it from to reflect what I did.  The recipe called for ham, but I don’t eat pork so I used turkey ham.  It was also less fatty, so better for me.  I used fresh baby spinach, but some recipes recommend using frozen.

One thing I can say right off the bat is- do not use a round slow cooker!  Or if you do, make half the recipe.  I also have an oval slow cooker, and this gives the eggs more of a cooking surface.  The round slow cooker did not allow the eggs to firm in the center, and so I ended up stirring the mixture to get more of a scrambled egg consistency rather than a casserole.  And this worked better for me, because I will put the eggs on toast or a bagel.  But if you want more of a quiche, use a larger, wider slow cooker to get that.

Another thing I noticed about this recipe was that the spinach released a lot of liquid, and the eggs got runny.  Next time, I think I will cut back on the spinach, or cook it first so it does not release so much liquid into the eggs.

Overall, the taste was great and it ended up being a perfect breakfast for me.  I put the eggs on wheat toast or a bagel to make a sandwich, but they can also be eaten on their own.  It’s an easy, healthy way to make breakfast.  And it doesn’t taste like normal diet food (aka: sand and sadness), so it makes it worth eating.  Healthy and delicious?  Good for me and not gag-inducing?  Perfect.

I estimate that my serving is about 250 calories (I’m estimating about 6 servings).  If you want fewer calories using less cheese (or a low fat version) would reduce the total.  Overall I’d say the recipe is a great option for someone who wants to eat a healthy, filling breakfast, but may not have a ton of time each day to make one.