Class Etiquette

This post will most likely sound like an old lady curmudgeon (word of the day- it means a bad tempered person, usually referring to a grumpy old coot), but people today have no manners. It seems that this has become the time, the place, and the FORUM to post my rules on gym etiquette. These are my rules:

1. If I’m in the locker room changing, don’t talk to me. Chatty Cathy wants to talk shop while skipping around in her birthday suit? Denied. Take the naked singing elsewhere. It creeps me out.

2. When I put my stuff down, and get set up- DON’T TOUCH MY STUFF. I have had people move my gym bag to take my spot, take my weights once I’ve put them down, and put their stuff on the bench I just set up. This makes me angry. And you won’t like me when I’m angry. . . because I silently walk away, sulk, look sad, and pout. I may even point a finger of judgement at you. . . when you aren’t looking. . . because I hate confrontation.

3. Don’t sweat on me. Seriously, that’s gross. If you are going to be kicking, punching, spinning, twirling, falling, or dying near me- keep your sweat to yourself. I have a severe aversion to having strangers fling bodily fluids on me.

4. Women of the gym world: yes, yoga pants are cute. And you want to fill them out- shoot. But could you please, please invest in seamless underwear? And if you like short shorts, go for it. But buy underwear that goes UNDER short shorts. I like Victoria’s Secret the same as the next girl, but it should NOT be Victoria Public every time you squat and lunge in front of me.